Getting rid of the pacifier
I’m not here to debate the benefits of pacifiers. Pacifiers can serve many purposes. In the early months, they satisfy an innate urge to suck. This can be particularly beneficial for premature babies and colicky infants and they may lower the risk SIDS. They can be of great comfort at difficult times. But some studies imply that the use of pacifiers by breastfeeding infants may reduce the length of time they breastfeed. And some research indicates that long-term use of a pacifier (4-5 years) can lead to a change in the structure of the mouth and positioning of the teeth. Read what’s out there and make your own decision. If you are a parent who has chosen to use a pacifier, however, there will come a time for your baby to give it up. This can be easy and it can be really hard.
It’s a pretty sure bet your child won’t go off to college with his binky. Most children will stop using it between the age of one and three, as long as the parents do not encourage its use. (Parents who constantly use a pacifier to keep their child quiet may find it harder to eliminate its use later on.) Many parents begin withdrawal by limiting the use of the pacifier to the home, then his room, then just at naptime and bedtime. Be sure to offer other sources of comfort like hugs and kisses, cuddling, listening to soft music, sharing favorite stories. Be sure your child uses his mouth for all sorts of activities like singing, sucking water through a straw, laughing, telling stories, making goofy faces with you.
Praise all “big boy” behavior, but don’t put him down when the baby behavior pops up. Putting on his own socks, potty training, graduating to a “big boy bed,” climbing on the playground equipment all deserve praise and reinforcement. My daughter reinforced the “big girl” behavior enough that, after months of gradual withdrawal, her daughter decided she should mail the binky to the hospital for the babies. Together they put her pacifiers in a box, took them to the post office and mailed them to the babies (a local friend who tossed them out). Got any suggestions you’d like to share?
Tags: Baby, bedtime, binky, infant, naptime, pacifier, sources of comfort, sucking
January 3rd, 2009 at 6:06 pm
I am a mother of two kids and both of my kids were born premature and when they were born, nurse asked us if we were going to have our baby have a pacifier. I really didn’t want to, but the nurse told me and my husband that premature babies need to have the pacifier because their mouths would have to learn how to suck so that they can breast feed or take the bottle. With our daughter, we took her pacifier one month before her 1st birthday. When we had taken that away from her, it was easy, and we were surprised cause she didn’t cry for it or even asked for it. She’s 2 1/2 now and she’s been doing fine without it. However, with our son who just turned one it is not so easy. We tried to take the binkie away, but it’s a little hard than what we expected. Sometimes at night it’s not always easy to put him to sleep without the pacifier in his mouth, but sometimes it’s our last resort. I don’t know how I could make a one yr old understand why he cannot have the binkie? I love my son very much, but how can I have this experience as easy like my daughter did?
January 5th, 2009 at 2:17 pm
Yvonne, I know it can be really hard with some children. My son and daughter both seemed to be able to give them up without too much heartache, but I have a much younger sister who clung to her binky until she was nearly five. Each child is different. Good luck with your son. Maybe someone ese will share some ideas.
January 22nd, 2009 at 3:56 pm
this is my favorite pacifier story
http://www.tertia.org/so_close/2009/01/we-did-it.html
February 6th, 2009 at 7:04 pm
My friend emailed me a link to a site that has a publication on losing the binky (it is free, makes money by advertisements). I have not tried it yet because my son is only 6 months old, but I think I will try the method out when he is around 1. It is http://www.bye-bye-binky.com for anyone who is interrested. If you do, let me know your thoughts….Bella
July 16th, 2009 at 4:45 pm
Hey Bella,
Thanks for sharing, I checked out http://www.bye-bye-binky.com (not only was it free, but they didn’t even ask for my email, thank goodness). We followed the poke and cut steps and three days later she was done, and the decision was hers. She even refused a binky at daycare yesterday! I tried to give her one during a major meltdown last night, but it seems even I have lost one of my best soothing tools (lol, it’s all good though). Thanks for sharing. Kind Regards, Jill
July 17th, 2009 at 9:25 am
Great link. Thanks everyone for your input.
January 6th, 2013 at 3:53 pm
Fun reading the strings. My son was so attached to his pacifier that it started to become a real problem. We could not go anywhere without making sure that we had a pacifier in hand. My friend also raved about the bye bye binky method so we decided to give it a try. All I can say is WOW, worked beautifully for my son with no tantrums, not even one! Super easy and four days later he had no interest in his binky. We really were amazed… highly recommended… Amber